MORE ON DATING

I wanted to add to the post encouraging the use of suits and French cuffs. When taking a lady out, you must always valet park. If the restaurant doesn't have valet, always drop the lady off in the very front and then go find a space. I encourage the use of this song when pulling up to the valet. I have no idea what they're talking about, but I love the beat. Don't turn down the system when you get out of the ride. Tip well. In fact, you should be tipping often in general (always carry plenty of dollars on your money clip), but especially when you're with a lady. The valet kid. The hostess. Think of it as an investment.

Oh, and never, under any circumstances, take a lady to a restaurant which requires you to hold a "beeper" or "pager" and wait until it "vibrates" to claim your table. That's just insulting. If that's all you can afford, cook for her at home instead.

In fact, I put a beautiful little antique table for two on the outdoor patio of the Luxury Beach Villa for this very purpose.
Ovulation tests
Alcohol tests

WEDDING CRASHERS

Are you still a big Hollywood star if LJ gets into places before you do? A couple of months back I had dinner with a friend in Santa Monica and then headed over to meet up with Jigga at White Lotus. I walked up to the front of the line and kindly asked the bouncer to lift the velvet rope and let me in. He said "for 80 dollars" he might be able to help me out. I responded: "Eighty dollars, huh? Let me make one phone call."

Of course, one phone call and I get right in.

Unfortunately for Owen Wilson and Vince Vaughan (still waiting outside in line), they didn't have the same luck. I told Jigga, "find out if Ben Stiller is lurking somewhere out there. If not, then get those guys in."

There's also another important lesson here: never pay to bypass lines and get into clubs, bars, or restaurants. Any loser taking your money to get you in a place is running a fradulent business. Simply contact LJ and I'll put you in touch with the right people and they'll see what they can arrange. This goes for any city in Cali, Vegas and most of the West. Heck, they can probably do NYC, too.

As we like to say, "All over the world, baby!"
Alcohol tests
Love lyrics